The Truth About SoCal Weather


I have a few readers out in the midwest and even one in the northeast (shout out to Becka!), many of whom probably think it’s all sunshine and roses out here in The Southland.  I want you folks to know that it’s only mostly sunshine and roses out here.  You midwesterners think we’re always at the beach.  You couldn’t be more wrong.  We’re only mostly at the beach.  We have very serious weather issues here to deal with.  If you don’t think it’s a big deal, you should watch our local news.  It never ceases to amaze me to see our daring reporters braving the elements.  Just the other day, Leanne Suter of ABC7 was out in a parka and it was… get this… sprinkling!  I’m so serious, folks, you can look up the news archives on their website.  See, us SoCal-ers are a tough breed.  If there’s a job to do while it’s sprinkling, we’ll put aside the worries of our hair getting all messed up, and get the job done!  Now if the sprinkle turns into a light drizzle, we head to the bomb shelters.  I mean, c’mon, you gotta draw a line somewhere!

What’s more, it rains probably 12 times a year.  Yeah, you read that right.  A dozen!  During an “El Nino” year, that number can swell to 15!  You midwesterners and New Englanders think you’ve got it all bad having to shovel snow out of your driveways.  Imagine what the BBQthDirector has to deal with in the dead of a SoCal winter.  I’m out trying to BBQ a couple racks of pork spare ribs, and it starts to sprinkle.  Do you have any idea how that messes up controlling the temperature in my smoker?  Or maybe I’m in the mood for Tri-Tip and mother nature unleashes her fury with a light drizzle.  I can hardly get the proper sear to caramelize the spices on my beef!  It’s awful!  So don’t complain to me about scraping ice off your windshield or your car not starting or something silly like your pipes freezing.  Don’t you dare!

And by the way, the image above is the real weather forecast.  I know, I know, there’s someone in Duluth, Minnesota thinking it’s gotta be photoshopped or something.  But it’s the harsh truth you don’t see in our liberal media.  A left leaning conspiracy that would tear down Sarah Palin and protect Barack Obama.  That liberal slant that tries to suppress the truth.  Well, the BBQthDirector is here to unleash the truth…

It won’t even get to 65 degrees this week in SoCal!  Pray for us.


14 comments so far

  1. Becka on

    lol Too funny. I can say this as I am not in SoCal anymore. It got all the way up to 65 yesterday and felt WONDERFULLY warmish. (I say warmish because I really am a Cali girl at heart). I’ll pray for all of you bc I remember what that is like – whew! only 60 degrees. FREEZING! Anyways, hopefully with all that rain, you won’t lose your house in a mudslide or anything (another misconception of “outsiders” – we have a bajillion mudslides and it affects our lives). lol Have fun at the beach! Wait, I forgot….too cold. 🙂

  2. lonestarpreacher on

    I’ll get my church together for a season of corporate prayer and fasting for ya’ll. Hang in there!

  3. jaynepomuceno on

    Okay, just had to pop in and give a quick report. It’s about 2:05 pm and in the last 10 minutes I’ve heard four claps of thunder! See, it’s bad out here! We’re gonna die!!

  4. rufeo/Renae on

    I love it! I am cracking up! it is so true and i have had to occupy 11 k-4 kids inside today because of the rain! It is so treacherous out there! 🙂 it is 54 degrees down here in the OC and my feet are freezing! They are probably purple though I can’t see them because of my boots! 🙂

  5. Renae on

    so the last comment I made somehow has Ruth’s name on it! I am sorry Jay and Ruth! 🙂

  6. Jeff on

    great post! curious what happens when the drizzle turns into steady rain?

  7. James on

    Being originally from northern part of this state where the fog and rain is a more regular occurrence, I had this strange feeling all day like I was back in San Francisco, but alas it was not true. I think I’ll hit the beach this Saturday, 61 and rain doesn’t sound too bad, after the frigid 59 we experienced today.

  8. jaynepomuceno on

    Renae, identity theft is a serious crime.

    Jeff, when that happens, we curl up into the fetal position, suck our thumbs and mumble incoherently.

  9. Katie on

    wow! that was great! I had no idea you SoCal residents had it so hard…it’s really opened my eyes to your guy’s suffering! haha james “frigid 59” I love it….try 20 now thats really cold!!! ;o)

  10. jaynepomuceno on

    Katie, 20 is waaaay passed cold. That’s just retarded! If I was there, I think I’d just break.

  11. rufeo on

    Wow! I love the rain but when the teperature is 45 here and its warmer in Wisconsin I begin to seriously consinder going to Maranatha.

  12. jaynepomuceno on

    Yes, Ruth, anything and anywhere to escape this SoCal winter!

  13. Daniel Ashton on

    You are going to join me here at MBBC, Ruth?? I guess there was that one day last week where it was warmer here. I am sorry you guys have to suffer through California’s tremendously cold winter.

  14. jaynepomuceno on

    Hey, yet another Ashton! Welcome, Daniel! Count your blessings that you’re in Wisconsin right now. We’ve been at about 55 degrees the last couple days. Burrrrrr!

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