Bracing for the Bitter Cold

Tough times don’t last, tough people do.

Yeah, but even as tough as we SoCal natives are, a weather forecast like the one above is going to push us to the brink.  It was so cold Monday, that I had to — get this — zip my jacket.  But before you winter uppity-ups in the upper midwest stick your frosty noses in the air, just consider what we’re up against.  Tuesday and Wednesday says “SUN & CLOUDS”.  Did you catch that second word?  We don’t do sun and clouds.  Sun and great waves, sun and whistling birds, sun and frozen yogurt are all acceptable combinations.  Clouds are over-rated.

Did your eyes go right to the number “39” under Wednesday?  That is the nighttime low.  I was tempted to contact the F.C.C. and report ABC7 for publishing such obscenity on their site.  As if clouds getting in the way of our glorious sunshine wasn’t enough, we also have to deal with such a perverse temperature.  We SoCal-ians zip up our jackets when it gets below 70, shiver uncontrollably below 60, renounce our faith below 50, and when it dips below 40….

We break.  That’s it.  We just crackle into itty-bitty tanned pieces.  So we stay indoors and grumble and complain while sipping our lattes or chai teas until global warming decides to kick in again.  But look at what we have to look forward to Thursday.  Yes, you read that right, half an inch of rain!  Rub your eyes, adjust your glasses, do whatever you will, it won’t change the painful truth of a downpour coming our way.  We don’t even have enough time to build an ark.

But don’t worry about us.  We’re a tough breed.  Times like this just serve to make us stronger.  And women all over the southland will finally have a legitimate reason to wear Uggs.

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14 comments so far

  1. Becka on

    Wow, I must say that forecast is…shocking. A whole half inch of rain? Umm…pretty sure that we got more than that overnight here and it’s still raining. Since it has been raining ALMOST non-stop for the past 2 weeks, my yard is no longer visible. I feels as if I live on a houseboat!

  2. Renae on

    lol… that is great Jay… I would have to agree with the “freezing” temperatures being a little too much… I mean 40 degrees at 8 in the morning is not fun! 🙂 But we will survive… and a little rain will make me happy!

  3. runnerforchrist on

    lol! i had no idea you had it so bad there in southern california! we’re going to be right at freezing today (which is rather mild) but single digits tomorrow! i might have to zip up my jacket!!! 😉 lol!

  4. Rodney on

    Good one! “itty bitty tanned pieces” made me truly LOL! I’m a so-cal, too, but it’s a bit different up here in Wrightwood.

  5. Doug Roman on

    Okay, just to help put some perspective on this. My office temperature is 60.4. The current outdoor temp is 7. But don’t be too concerned because the high will be 9. Wind chill factored in, -10. Projected low: -11 (air temp). 59 and a zipped jacket all of the sudden sounds like a tropical paradise . . . like I said earlier, I hope the zipper on your jacket breaks!

    Warm holiday greetings,

    Doug

  6. Daniel on

    wow, i am glad I am not in SoCal, If it was that cold and there is no chance of snow, that would be depressing. We however, got nearly a foot of snow last night and it is still snowing, which is great for throwing snowballs at people and building giant snowmen in the middle of a field.

  7. jenmarie on

    I think it’s been colder than that…Yesterday my car said it was 34 and I had to wait for the ice on my windshield to thaw because I actually don’t keep an ice scraper in my car anymore… And I heard it was 28 at 5 AM in La Verne yesterday… – so I feel like it’s actually warming up a bit…But it’s been a pretty cold CA winter so far…Our weather’s so weird. I remember coming home for Christmas one year (05 or 06?) and it was 90 degrees on Christmas day!

  8. Clo on

    It hasn’t been that cold, Jay, you’re just a big baby…Just Kidding!!! You looked like a big marshmallow this morning!!! LOL!! we all loved that you wore that HUGE jacket!!! lol! you made us laugh…alot!

  9. jaynepomuceno on

    I AM a big baby, and I know it! My Michelin Man jacket is the bomb. I’m thinking of wearing it to church instead of my suit coats.

    runnerforchrist in WI and Doug in MN, I just had to look at your weather forecast and I have just one word: MOVE.

  10. Becka on

    Jay, that was the best advice I have ever heard.

  11. janet2000 on

    Uggs are so cute! That’s a legitimate reason.

  12. zaza on

    legitimate reasons to wear uggs! haha. lol.

  13. allie on

    so funny!! 🙂 found your blog searching for chuck noris jokes. you should really think about copyrighting your material! btw, the weathers rough in phx, az too! 😉 lol!!!

  14. Dianna on

    This makes me laugh. Vincent and I just came back from some real cold weather. The day we left it was a high of 39. My blood is not use to that anymore.


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