Is Your Church Like Mine?

 I have a weekly teen bulletin called the “Youth Light”.  It has the dates for coming events, special news and serves to give visitors and the ones who show up early something to read.  Also, there’s a prize for figuring out the answer to the “mind boggler” (riddle).  It’s extra work but a pretty important tool.  Plus, it’s fun occassionally coming up with the humor section myself.  I cracked myself up with last week’s list.  One would have to understand my church to “get it”, but maybe your church is similar.

You Might go to Lighthouse Baptist Church of La Verne if….

-you think it’s weird to go home right after the service

-you’re white and think you deserve minority rights

-you’re Filipino and think you’re somehow related to half the church

-someone says “amen” and if it’s not Jay, you think it’s a visitor

-you have ever been asked to volunteer for an R.U. program (and you don’t go to R.U.)

-you’ve gone to the altar for sneaking into a different line at a potluck

-you call a bounce house a jumping house

-you clapped during the service and felt guilty all week

-you’ve wondered where all the adults are on Saturday mornings

-you’ve ever come out for soul-winning but couldn’t go ‘cause you couldn’t find a ride-

-you’ve ever despised your youth while standing in a potluck line

-you’ve ever experienced “sensory overload” from all the accents you hear

-you’ve ever considered taking that special someone out for a date to the LBA Café and Little Bucks

-you’ve ever wondered what the difference is between our regular potlucks and our international potluck

-you’re not grossed out by the sight of a whole roasted suckling pig laying next to the pasta salad

-the primary reason you look at the screens is just to see the sound guys mess up

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8 comments so far

  1. Renae Ashton on

    lol… I read it to Ruth and we cracked up together 🙂 These are so true… I miss Lighthouse sometimes but am happy where the Lord has me! 🙂 I love the one about the screen! Thanks for the memories

  2. mct88 on

    I am re-blogging this post! HILARIOUS.

    My faves would be figuring out the difference between regular vs international potlucks? Maybe it would be the extreme dishes of food brought? You can’t really get extreme after seeing a whole pig on the table…

    And the screens. HAHA, I am guilty of such 🙂

  3. […]  I have a weekly teen bulletin called the "Youth Light".  It has the dates for coming events, special news and serves to give visitors and the ones who show up early something to read.  Also, there's a prize for figuring out the answer to the "mind boggler" (riddle).  It's extra work but a pretty important tool.  Plus, it's fun occassionally coming up with the humor section myself.  I cracked myself up with last week's list.  One would have to un … Read More […]

  4. Pokey on

    Hmm, I resemble some of this….

  5. Angel on

    when i read this on sunday, i was cracking up!!

  6. robb on

    hahahaha no way!! thats so dead on! i love it jay

  7. Jen on

    Maybe more people will start showing up for visitation now? =)

  8. Renae Archer on

    Ah, this stuff is so true! I miss our church so much and will be happy to get back in a few weeks! It feels like forever since I was last there!


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