A Ghetto Christmas

I know, I know, you wouldn’t think that a high class, sophisticated guy like me grew up on the wrong side of the tracks (more like right on the tracks), but it’s the truth.  Southeast San Diego (Paradise Hills and Skyline) was where it all started.  For those not familiar with the area, if San Diego was a jacket, Southeast would be “the hood”.  Anywizzle, I now live in a peaceful suburb, but I’ll never forget my roots.  So here’s my version of a beloved Christmas poem (to be read with all the ghetto-fabulousness you can muster up):
 
‘Twas the night befo’ Christmas, and all through the hood
The po-lice weren’t messin’, ’cause it was “all good”
The tube socks were hung on the clothes line wid care
In hopes that “Big Red” soon would roll there

The homees all warm and toasty in bed
Sweet thoughts in their hearts, doo-rags on their heads
They sneak down to the tree, hope for gifts on their wish list
But mom looks up stairs and cries, “Mind yo’ own bidness!”
 
So back to their rooms with a smile and a sigh
Then hit the floor quickly when a car slowly drives by
“But that ain’t no car!” the homees all say
“Maybe it’s Santa, rollin’ up in his sleigh!”
 
Then to their surprise, they hear a loud bump
He better be quiet, or he just might get jumped
And maybe before he says good-bye with a wave
He’ll grub on the cookies and drink their Kool-Aid

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Speaking of ghetto, we’ve made some pretty awesome food finds in downtown L.A. (how’s a bacon-maple donut sound?).  Read all about it at The Fun Foodie!

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6 comments so far

  1. Angel on

    i see you used my(corrected)joke, Jay!

  2. Jay on

    Angel, you are inspiring! As long as you understand what types of clothing have hoods!

  3. Randy Smith on

    I like when does the music version for Choirs come out?

  4. Jen on

    lol too funny!
    Happy Bday by the way! I can’t believe I missed your age on the Bday quiz! Do I get extra points though for guessing you were 35? lol

  5. Jay on

    Bonus points for 25. Out of luck for 35! Still, old guys rule!

  6. jenmarie on

    Hahaha well it would be pretty weird if you were younger than me. lol.


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